I Want to Be a Missionary--part 2

Pass-along cards

But I never stopped trying to serve a mission by befriending and loving those who were not 
active in the Church or non-members. Whenever Ed and I traveled, a brought along a Book of Mormon or two, pass-along cards and Article of Faith cards, but I never used them. I felt more of a failure as a missionary than ever.

As I grew older, I began to consider a family history mission after I retired from work because I loved genealogy. I recall clearly when I was 12 years old and visited my Grandmother Hansen in Monroe, Utah. (As far as I can determine, I was the only grandchild who ever stayed a week or so with her, and I don’t know why I was so blessed.) She taught me to do genealogy and sew!!! An avid genealogist, she had done family work for about 50 years and researched her line and her husband’s line extensively. I caught the genealogy bug from her at that time.

My Grandmother Hansen

I copied many of the family histories she had, and any time I was in Utah, I would try to get more genealogy from my grandmother’s family. After we retired to Utah, my cousin and I went to southern Utah and got two boxes of my grandmother’s genealogy from my father’s cousin, Agnes Holgate. I also attended all the family reunions and gathered more information and family histories. Reluctantly I copied my grandmother’s genealogies and sent them to my sister Ann, because I was working full-time and didn’t have time to do more with them.

When Ed and I retired from work in 2009, I still hoped that we could serve a couple mission, but six months before our

Ed right after his lung transplant

retirement, Ed’s health declined rapidly, and six months after we retired, we moved to Los Angeles for him to get a lung transplant. It took us nine months before we could go back home, but it gave Ed four good years of life. We were able to travel as we’d hoped to do after retirement, but a mission was not in our plans.

When Ed died two-and-half years ago, I considered a mission again, but so many things interfered. It took a year to settle things from his death, and my health continued to be a major problem.

Ed and I had traveled a lot in the four years he was healthy and we set aside a monthly savings account to pay for these trips. After his death, I

Ed and I on one of our vacations

decided to take my grandchildren on a trip somewhere when they graduated from high school, college or finished a mission. I had grandchildren on both coasts of the country and this was a way I could bound with them and continue to travel. I took two grandchildren to Costa Rica where my grandson had recently returned from a mission in 2016; I brought along my standard missionary stuff, but the closest I came to talking to anyone about the church was on a snorkeling excursion when a lady in our boat and I talked about family history, and I gave her my card, with information about family

Snorkeling with my grandkids in Costa Rica

search.

I recall very clearly where I was sitting in one Sacrament Meeting when Stake President Blair Morris issued a challenge for every available individual to serve a mission. He told of a couple serving a mission when the husband died, and President Morris felt inspired to call on a couple in our stake who’d never considered a mission, but who had been praying to serve in some way. They quickly adjusted their schedules and took the place of the couple who had been released.

Me

I received the inspiration as he talked that I MUST serve a mission as a family history missionary, and I should prepare to do so. It had been in the back of my mind since my husband had died to serve a family history mission, but President Morris’ talk confirmed to me that now was the time.

I worked on my serious health problems, and I volunteered to work at the Bountiful Utah Family History Library. I set the deadline to begin missionary service as June 2017. I planned on taking my granddaughter, Kira, whose father and everyone in his family were inactive in the church, on a cruise in May 2017, and I felt like that since the next grandchild to graduate was three years away I could complete a mission in the meantime.

But it wasn’t that easy; in March 2017, I had my gall bladder removed, and had complications; I ended up back in the hospital for two days. No one could figure out why I was having so much trouble with my breathing, and I was on oxygen, first all day, then after a month or so, just at night. I felt worried that I couldn’t serve two full days a week as a missionary in the Salt Lake City Family History Center if I was still having health problems, but I kept praying for reassurance that I should serve as a missionary.

Me & my granddaughter cave tubing in Belize

During my Caribbean cruise with my granddaughter Kira in May of 2017, I continued to pray daily to be a missionary and again brought missionary stuff with me. I tried to talk to people about the Church, but had little success. One night I was again praying for a missionary experience, and expressing my thoughts of failure, when the thought came to me that I was being a missionary to Kira, who along with her family wasn’t active in the Church. I often had the opportunity to share spiritual experiences with Kira that my mother, my grandfather and I had had in our lives. It wasn’t in a “Here is the missionary message I need to give you,” but in a relaxed and casual way as we talked about our family. It just came naturally. I had the reassurance that there are many ways to be a missionary, and this was one good way.

I wish I could say I started my mission in June 2017, but I discovered I had bad cataracts in both eyes, and surgery to repair them was scheduled during June and July. My lung problems seemed to be resolved; I no longer needed to be on oxygen, although they never determined a reason for my problems, and there was no positive assurance that I would not have a relapse. But I knew that it was time to put in my paperwork to serve a mission in September 2017.

I know that there is a time for every season, and this is my season to serve a mission, and I am looking forward to it!  I am excited about going on a mission—even if I am in my mid-70s.

I Want to Be a Missionary—Even if I’m in My 70s

My graduation photo

I can’t remember a time when I did not want to go on a mission. All through high school, I just planned that I would go on a mission when I was 21 years old (the age then for women), and took preparatory classes, both Seminary and Institute on preparing to serve a mission.

Then I went to college and married before I was old enough to serve a mission. But I never gave up hope. All my married life, I tried to be a member missionary. My husband was in the military and we lived all over the world, a great opportunity to be a missionary, but I never succeeded in seeing one person I’d taught be baptized.

Our wedding photo

I remember my attitude about who might join the Church changed in 1975 when we lived at Ft. Hood, Texas. Most of my friends were people who were active in their own churches, and I shared my testimony of the truthfulness of the gospel with them; none of them were interested in the Church.

Our family in 1976

However, one of the officers in Ed’s unit was contacted by the missionaries through tracting and really became interested in the Church.  I was shocked because he had been living with his girlfriend without being married, and was one of the biggest partiers in our unit.  But after he and his girlfriend (who by then was his wife) turned their lives around and joined the Church, I was very humbled.  They became very active in the Church and made a great contribution to our small ward. 

That opened my eyes to see that many people might be interested in the gospel, despite their lifestyle. But I still didn’t help convert anyone. But I always befriended many different people, and I often testified of the joy the gospel brought to my life.

When my husband retired from the military and we moved to Utah, I began working full-time. My husband felt that after 23 years in the demanding military, he wanted a chance to be the primary caretaker to our youngest son who was three years old at the time. So, he decided that it was my turn to work full-time for 20 years, and let him be a stay-at-home father. I can remember when I was offered a full-time job that I didn’t apply for—they came to me to ask me work as the IT person at the American Cancer Society.

Me during my early years of work

To say I was conflicted was too simple. I had been a full-time mother for 24 years, and I didn’t want to work full-time. I was afraid to ask Ed for a priesthood blessing because I knew he wanted me to take the job, so I asked my father, a long-time advocate that women should never work, to give me a priesthood blessing to help me in my decision. I couldn’t see how he could tell me to work when he was so against women working.

Quoting from my diary of 24 July 1991:

“Diana, Bryan and I went over to Dad's on Sunday afternoon.   Dad began to give me the blessing, and after a bit said, "I feel . . ." then paused for a long time.  When he started again, he blessed me in vague ways that didn't mean much.  A little later in the blessing, he said again, "I feel . . ." and paused longer.  Finally, he said, "I feel . . ."  again and blessed me in a way that made it seem like I would go to work.  That's when I really began to cry, because I knew then what he was saying--that I would have to work.”

My father

(I remember vividly shaking my head as Dad told me that working was what the Lord wanted me to do.) 

“But there was no doubt that the blessing was a confirmation that I would have to work.  After I finished, Dad was shaking and we had all really felt the spirit!  He said that every time he started to say that he felt that I should stay home, or continue my schooling, it was like a stupor came over him and he couldn't continue!  He had to stop until he said the other words, that for now I'd have to face the challenges and take advantage of the opportunities that came my way.

“It was neat, and I felt the confirmation, but I was still upset because I don't want to work so badly!  But I will do it, if that's what's the Lord wants because I know that I can trust Him to guide me to do what's best for me and my family.  Dad also blessed my family through me, too, so I feel reassured that despite my misgivings, it will work out!”

I also remember in that blessing, I was promised that Ed would be blessed through my working, and that worked out also in the 18 years I worked full time.

(To be continued)

Letters from Vietnam--Flying Command and Control

FLYING COMMAND & CONTROL

27 April 1967

Ed in Vietnam 1967-68

I had a really big day yesterday. I started flying at 7:00 a.m. and didn’t finish until 7:30 p.m. I got 9:40 flying time, and I was really beat! But it was really interesting and dangerous!! I was flying C&C (command and control) ship and I’d go into an area and pick someone up and the next ship in would get shot up! I guess someone is looking after me.

In the fight we were in yesterday, we had three U.S. killed and eight wounded. As of yet, we don’t know how many VC. I’ll find out this afternoon as we are going back and finish policing up the area. But the fighting is over in the area! Also, we had the air force and artillery pounding the area so it was really quite an operation.

 Well, it’s still really warm and we get rain every day, so the ground is always wet. I’m just glad I have a halfway decent place to stay. Dirty, but at least we have a roof over our heads.

28 April 1967

Gunship in Vietnam

I have been flying as a command and control ship, and it has gotten really hairy at times.

You asked what a C&C aircraft is. It is not always a 23, but quite often it is a Huey. Mainly all we do is keep track of the troops and the actions which they are having and bring in reinforcements, artillery, etc., if needed. 

FLYING GUNSHIPS, ESCORTING A CONVOY

2 May 1967

Escorting a ship convoy

Well, last month I flew 13 days and 62.9 hours. Already this month (two days), I have 12 hours, so I’ll probably end up with well over a hundred hours this month. Today I was in the gunships and we were escorting a boat convoy south of Saigon. We picked them up at Ben Luc and followed them down to Tan Tru and back. We got in a couple of small battles, but it’s hard to say whether we got an VC or not. We sure shot the area up in several places. Right along the river, southeast of Ben Luc, there was a big battle last night and we lost 13 troops and I haven’t heard about the VC casualties. But this whole area is covered with VC.

When we got back, they had an alert so we killed a couple more hours sitting in bunkers, so all in all, today has been quite busy. 

Helicopter bombing run (look closely and you can see the gunships)